Some of you may not know that I am in fact a criminal after an unfortunate brush with the law a while back.
I was on my way to visit my good friend Catrinder Wiffendorinian and I was running late. Very late. I was singing along to a CD, which, in the interest of retaining some degree of self respect shall not be named, trying my best to make up a bit of time. So I put my foot down and off I go on the motorway. There I am happily minding my own business enjoying my singsong when I see some blue lights behind me. I then noticed the blue lights are in fact a police car. I couldn’t understand why they didn’t over take me, they had their lights flashing, clearly in pursuit of someone, or something, why waste their time behind my Corsa?
Some time later I noticed the police car was really close behind me and the police man was gesturing at me pointing at the hard shoulder. It was then, and only then, that I realised he was after me. Little old me in my sharkmobile was been chased by the police. But I’m late, this is going to make me more late, so I keep going a bit more thinking I’ll soon be at my destination we can sort it out there.
Mr Police man started to look mad, really mad. So, I pull over to be greeted by an angry police man, who informed me he was about to call the helicopters for back up! He shouted. I put on the best posh sensible voice I could manage, and somehow talked my way out of a prosecution for driving without due car and attention and settled with a speeding fine and 3 points.
If I had gone that little bit further I could have been a star of the next ‘police, camera action’ or ‘high speed police chase’.
Luckily, I manged to avoid prison sentence, which would have been pointless anyway because as you can see from the picture below, you can't keep a shark locked up in a cage or cell for long anyway...